I had one of the tastiest and most simple sandwiches in the world when I visited Rome with my sister and mother. I saw these sandwiches everywhere there was food to go. It seemed to be a very easy sandwich to grab and munch on while going about your business. I do realize this sandwich can probably be found all over the US, too. Since I don’t visit delis or sandwich shops I’ve personally never come across this exact combo before.
But let me tell you, it was all kinds of yummy and like I said before…simple. For me, however, that’s the catch. When something is that simple I feel it must be a trick, deception, actually quite intimidating. Okay, not intimidating. I exaggerate. But I did think it would be difficult to recreate. Why? It was the salami. I have tasted some gnarly salamis before and I was afraid I wouldn’t find the right one. The problem I find is that the ones I’ve tried taste way too fatty. You’re saying to yourself “Well what’s salami without the fat?” Oh, I get THAT. I just don’t like chewing on a piece that TASTES like it’s all fat. Yuck! It also couldn’t be overwhelmingly pepper. So I looked and looked and what would you know, I found the perfect salami. It tastes exactly like I had from that cafe in Rome. Perfection. You’ll laugh at its name, too, it’s so funny. Italian Dry Salame. Yup. That’s it. LOL
So do you want to try out this extremely easy and absolutely yummy sandwich. Alright, let’s get to it.
What you’ll need:
Italian Dry Salame
One boiled egg, sliced into thin ovals
Two slices white bread (yes, white…do not substitute)
Spread a very thin layer of mayo onto each slice. You don’t want to taste it, it’s just that moisture layer. Place salami onto a slice of bread so it’s a one layer (one layer of salami, one layer of egg). Depending on salami and bread size it’ll be about 5 . Now lay sliced egg onto the salami in one layer as well. Wrap sandwich tight in saran wrap.
Place the cutting board on sandwich and put that heavy pan right on top. We’re tightening this baby up. I’m sure this is not how they did it in that cafe I got the sandwich. But the sandwich was so compact when I had it, this is what I felt would replicate it. Leave sandwich under this weight about 10 minutes. In the meantime, make yourself a nice cup of coffee. The two go very well together.
Alright, you’re ready to eat. Unwrap this treat and slice it in half, triangles. Why? Because that’s how I bought it and that’s how I’ll continue to do it. LOL Thanks for humoring me.
Et voila!! I know, wrong language. Cut me some slack, I don’t know Italian. And sorry for the crappy picture. I’m not great at taking all those beautiful food pictures that apparently even my youngest can do better than me. But anyway…there you have it. A very (yeah I’ll admit it…very) simple yet extremely delicious sandwich. Your own little taste of Rome right in your own kitchen.
The new school year has started and that means I have become obsessed with food. School lunches, can’t forget Kenny’s lunch, and of course the most important meal of the day…dinner. Oh, you thought it was breakfast? No, sir. It’s dinner and I will tell you why. It’s the only meal of the day that all five of us get to sit down and enjoy together. I tend to obsess over the meals a wee bit during the school year. During the summer when our days are stress free and not as hectic it’s so easy to take our time with meal prep and timing, etc. But during the school year I NEED to be on top of what’s going on in that kitchen.
Here’s the thing…I used to work full time and go to school full time as well. I’ve been home alone while Kenny was deployed, I’ve either just worked or just been a student. And you know what I learned about myself from those periods in my life? I LOVE being here right now. My days revolve around doing the things that I once rushed to do in the evenings or weekends, and now I get to put in an unbelievable amount of thought into our meals. Unfortunately, some would say, that’s turned into an obsession. LOL
I have lists, crazy lists. I have pages bookmarked on my computer, and I just started “pinning” things on Pinterest. Ugh, that’s another post all of its own. I have an e-mealz subscription to help me along when I feel I need more variety and Allrecipes.com is a very good friend of mine as well. I have my handy dandy dry erase board on the fridge with dinners written out for the week so the kids & Kenny don’t have to ask every two minutes what’s on the menu. No, scratch that…they still do. And I have a disgustingly sick plethora of lunch containers for the family. Now that I think about it, maybe I do have too much time on my hands. Who DOES this? I need to get paid for this shit.
But seriously, there was a point to this strange post. I am hoping as the year progresses to share some successes in the kitchen along with some of the failures as well. I have been cooking for 29 years and I find myself still learning something new everyday. I also plan on recreating some of my favorite dishes. You know those meals you eat at a restaurant or deli, or when you were vacationing and now you’re thousands of miles from that one place that makes the best (fill in the blank), that dinner your best friend’s mom made you that one time you visited her…yeah, those dishes. I hope to be able to recreate some of my favorites and share them with you.
So as you can see I’m going to share a little more of everything. I titled this blog “The Glamorous Life of a Domestic God-DESS ” and I found myself not sharing so much of the domestic part. Well, I am now. The good, the bad, the ugly and the insanely boring at times, too. LOL I’ll try to spice it up and make it amusing. But if I fail…don’t tell me. Just keep reading, chuckling (yes, that is a prerequisite), and tell me I’m a good girl. Wait…wrong blog.
So as I wait patiently (yeah, right LOL) for my new calendar for this cycle I have things to keep me busy, thank goodness. Unfortunately that still doesn’t quiet down my brain. I have a really bad habit of multitasking when there’s no need to. Sitting down and watching a movie with Kenny. Great! But then I have a couple of books open working on next week’s dinner menu. It’s Monday…it can wait!! That’s just one stupid example of not being able to sit and enjoy being in the moment. Multitasking when there’s no need for it. Honestly, this really has nothing to do with anything, just something that popped into my mind this morning getting Clara and Kenny’s lunches together this morning. This was before I drew a mustache and goatee on Collin as he slept. Yeah, I get bored sometimes.
Clara started school last week. We’re hoping it’s a better year for her as last year was a bit of a struggle for us as parents. So far she’s only had to be told to dye her blonde locks to a more natural color which isn’t too bad. We did black, LOL. The younger ones start school next week and that means hours spent in the car every week. This gets challenging for me. I don’t mind the drive, that’s the easy part. I drive about 2 hours everyday. 30 minutes to, 30 minutes from…twice a day. That’s 80 miles everyday. This doesn’t include the time spent sitting in the car waiting for them to go in or be dismissed. Not a big deal, I know. But I HAVE to have something entertaining to do in the car while waiting. Talk radio, books, magazines, watching the birds eat worms. So this week I’ve added to my “To Do” list downloading tons of books to my Kindle and collecting magazines to read in the car. This is exciting stuff, huh? Don’t be jealous.
And one last thing running through my mind this past week…my “I want” list. Kenny says I’m pretty easy when it comes to buying me gifts. It totally sucks buying him his presents. I NEVER know what to get him. For many years I’d buy him something I put lots of thought into only to see him never use it. I only just got it right this past Christmas and birthday. Me, though…pretty easy. I’m not a girlie girl in the least so he’s happy not to have to buy me jewelry. I prefer t-shirts and jeans so being that I’m a MAD Smashing Pumpkins fan and a freak for Tom Petty I can expect that I shall get a new tee on every occasion. Did you say vinyl? Why, yes, I love me some records. DVDs? Yes, sir. But only if they’re the Golden Girls. I’ve had these on my list for awhile with no success, though. What the hell, Kenny? Actually, I know the problem here. Unfortunately Kenny is not a fan. I know…if I’d known that coming into the marriage…. But me thinks he doesn’t want to have the show on TV anymore than he has to…every night from 11pm to 1am. I’m pretty sure his dreams have much to do with Rose, Blanche, Dorothy and Sophia. He won’t fess up, though.
I’m also one of those weird women who LOVES getting kitchen appliances as presents. I wanted an extra refrigerator for Christmas and Kenny said no to that. Boooo!!! It would have rocked, I tell ya. I also want a deep fryer. Kenny’s afraid it will be an excuse to fry everything we eat. Duh!! He’s such a party pooper sometimes.
So as you can see, I’m pretty easy I think. Except I’m about to share what Kenny is getting me for my next birthday. He doesn’t know yet, so don’t tell him. Oooooh, I can’t wait. I’m so excited. Wait for it, wait for it…
Isn’t it lovely? My sister has an extreme hatred for these things and out of that was born an awesome idea. First of all, admit it. The MacBook Pro is beautiful and rocks and everything else sucks, right? Anyway, she says only douchebags buy them. So out of this came the idea for the dBag. LOL I want a computer bag for my MacBook that says “dBag” on it. Grey or black computer case with dBag written on it in the same font Mac uses. Isn’t it an AMAZING idea? All I have to do is find someone who will make it for me. My brother-in-law and I are so far the only two people I know who will use these awesome bags. Well, maybe not him so much but I know my sister will give it to him. If you know anyone who can make these, let me know. And if you see Kenny, don’t tell him what he’s getting me for my birthday. I want it to be a surprise.
***Edited to add…The idea of the dBag was in fact my other sister’s idea, Daisy. She threatened to cut me if I didn’t set the record straight. I apologize for all the trouble I may have caused by confusing my two sisters. Yeesh, you can take the girl out of the hood, but you can’t take the hood out of the girl.
Last Tuesday I went in for my regular bloodwork and ultrasound appointment, the last screening to be done before I was to have my transfer. Everything looked great and merrily I skipped on about my day. Did some shopping, came home and ordered the last of my home pregnancy tests online, hit confirm order and my phone rings. No, seriously. That is exactly how it happened, at that exact moment. It was my agency calling to tell me that our cycle had been cancelled. Unfortunately the egg donor was not progressing as expected and at the recommendation of the doctor, we were cancelling this cycle.
Ugh, my day was instantly ruined. I don’t know why (I’d like to blame it on the a-a-a…sorry, just kidding…tons of estrogen in my body) but I suddenly felt like crying. Within the next hour I received the next call from the nurse to cease all meds. What? All my hard work, setting alarms to remember everything and now I have to start over. Was I really about to cry? Then it hit me. DAMN! I was being selfish and my IF (intended father) must feel even worse. Emails and texts were exchanged and I felt better as my IF was on top of this. Like ninja style “I got this!” The hunt was on for a new donor and since there was nothing else I could do, I needed to start looking at all the positives.
The extra month gives us the chance to push the delivery (pun intended ) into June and the kids will be out of school. This means we won’t have to make special arrangements for school pickups and dropoffs, if need be, when the time comes. I also get an extra month of intense workouts. Working out is my only real ME time (except when I’m on the toilet LOL) so I enjoy it immensely. Pregnancy means more tame sessions. And now my IF has found a great proven donor which we are super stoked about. Yay!! There’s some other positives in this, I know, just can’t think of more at the moment. LOL But never fear, I’ll be adding more to my list as the month progresses.
As crappy as I felt when I got that phone call and having to stop meds and start over, I know there are worse things we can experience in surrogacy and pregnancy in general. However, that doesn’t make this suck any less at the moment. I will continue to remind myself of those lovely positives I already listed, though. It’s surrogacy after all and we’re going to have these pesky little bumps along the way. All we can do is work past them.
That’s basically all that’s going on right now with the surrogacy. It’s very important stuff, don’t get me wrong. It’s just appearing a little too static to be happening, know what I mean? But my weekly appointments at the local fertility clinic really do help as they slam me with a little “Booyah! In yo’ face!” action to show me that yeah, stuff’s happening alright.
At the moment I am taking 3 Estrace pills a day and doing my delestrogen shots once every 3 days and still doing daily Lupron injections as well. In addition I’m taking 5 prenatals a day (3 different types). It’s funny watching me take these. I have to drink TONS of water to take just one pill regularly so taking 5 is killing me. LOL I’m such a drama queen, I swear. I’m sitting there with my 5 pills whining the whole time about how full my belly is. Being around me when I’m old is going to be SO much fun for Kenny.
Starting a couple of weeks ago I started to go in for weekly bloodwork and ultrasound appointments. This is where they check my estrogen level and my uterine lining. Gotta get some nice, pretty numbers to be sure I’m ready to grab hold of those awesome embryos to grow my IF a beautiful baby. So far I’ve had great numbers. This past Tuesday my lining was already at 14. Yay! Great estrogen number as well.
Transfer is still set for the 8th or 10th of August (hoping for the 10th for that nice 5day transfer) and I’m feeling more anxious with each day. Eeeek, how exciting! Thankfully I’ve had to get back into the routine of being home to keep me busy. Clara starts school in a couple of weeks so getting her ready and appointments for myself and the kiddos has kept my mind busy as well. Plus I have started doing a new yoga routine that is supposed to help with fertility. Now, granted, these are meant to help those trying to conceive but the basic principles for doing them definitely applies. I’m a big dork, I know. Less than two weeks, ladies and gentlemen. Yay!
…when I visit the Valley. I freakin’ love to eat. I’m really not picky and will eat just about everything, with only a few no-no’s on my list. But for the most part I do watch what I eat and indulge every once in awhile so as not to deprive and throw myself into a feeding frenzy when going without my favorites for too long.
When I go to the Valley to visit family, though…forget about it! I will eat all the crap I miss and love and don’t get to eat very often. And I do it everyday. Not only that, but when I go down there I don’t exercise and am pretty fucking sedentary. I like sleeping in and staying up at night and watching scary flicks with my sister. We have lots of fun but I thought it’d be fun to share with you some of the crap I eat when I visit since I just got back a couple of weeks ago.
When I visit my my sister we have to feed 7 kids and we have to make tons of food. These are some delicious sliders I made. Now this isn’t really “crappy” food, but it just goes to show how much food we make.
Pizza anyone? Take a look at this giant pizza. It’s actually bigger than this picture makes it look. We ordered 3 HUGE ones and I must say it was about the best pizza I’ve had in quite a long time. I’d say since I was a teenager on the boardwalk in some coastal California town. Yummmm…
Jello cake. Yeah…just ’cause. No, just kidding. We made it for 4th of July. But if it hadn’t been we probably still would have made it. LOL
We’d been wanting to visit this cute little cupcake shop that opened up in Harlingen for awhile now. We said that the next time we were down we’d definitely visit. Well, we made it to Kay Kito’s and I must say…wow. They have specials everyday in addition to their usuals. They had so many yummy choices we took a little bit of everything. LOL
All the delicious tacos, oh my lord. Fatty, fatty, somebody please stop me. I know they don’t look pretty but godDAMN they’re good. These are beans, chorizo & eggs, and potato & egg.
SLEEPOVER!!! We separated up the kiddos between us adults and had a boy sleepover at my sister’s house (her husband handled the boys) and us girls headed to my mother’s and had our girl sleepover. Junk food and scary flicks galore. And of course you can’t have a sleepover without crap to eat. Cheesy poooooooffffffs!
And last but definitely NOT least…raspas! I HAVE to have a leche raspa, at least one. I cannot get a good raspa here in San Antonio, and forget about a leche raspa anywhere else but Harlingen. Leche means milk but yet the leche raspa does NOT taste like milk, thank goodnesss. I hate milk. But the freakin’ leche raspa is amazingly yummy. Every little raspa stand throughout the Valley has their own recipes for certain flavors but Harlingen Leche is my absolute favorite. Damn I love those things. This is so sad to admit but for me and the kids, this is the highlight (besides hanging with the family, of course) of our trips to the Valley.
Hooray, I’m so excited! So right now we have a transfer date of either 8 or 10 August, depending on whether it’s a 3 or 5 day transfer. It feels so good to have actual dates spelled out for us rather than a roundabout timeframe.
So for your viewing pleasure, here is my calendar. You are now free to “ooooooh” and “aaaaaahhhhhhh”.
07/11/11 US/E2 (Ultrasound and estrogen level) Lupron Start- After phone/email confirmation
07/15/11 Take last ACTIVE birth control pill and expect a period (I don’t care if you think it’s TMI. LOL )
07/19/11 US/E2-If OK, start Estrogen- After phone/email confirmation
07/26/11 US/E2-Lining check
08/02/11 US/E2-Lining check
08/05/11 Possible Progesterone Start
08/08/11 Possible Embryo Transfer- Day-3/ GSN
08/10/11 Possible Embryo Transfer- Day-5
I’m kind of in a limbo right now, waiting for the actual work to start in making this baby. As a surrogate, of course. Otherwise it’d be a little TMI. I give myself various projects and events throughout the year so that I can always have something to look forward to or work on to sort of break up the monotony of everyday life. Of course they are things that I enjoy and get all jazzed about and perhaps not necessarily things you may find all that interesting. I realize that as time gets closer to said event or completion of project, that I can very annoyingly make all topics of conversation somehow relate to said event going on in my life. And I thought to myself “Wow, that must be REALLY annoying to others.” But then I started to think of when my family and friends do it, and truthfully…it doesn’t bother me when they do it. I love it. I enjoy listening to these fascinating projects, events, etc and sometimes I even find myself living vicariously through them because what I’ve got going on in my life blows.
However, this did get me thinking on the topic of what I probably do to annoy those around me. The truth is, I really don’t care. I know that’s not the nice thing to say but the way I look at is if I annoy you, ignore me, unfriend me on facebook, avoid me when you see me out in public…whatever you need to do to not get annoyed by me, just do it. I’m okay with that. Unless you are a blood relative. Then you must deal with it, smile, nod your head and agree with me that what I’m doing is the coolest thing ever to happen in the existence of humankind.
But I thought it’d be nice to give you a heads up, cheat sheet, whatever you want to call it, of the things that may annoy you about me or might even…gasp…make you hate me. And just so you know, I did kind of steal this idea from Kelly whose blog “I’m Not the Mom, I’m Just the Stork“ is one of my absolute favorites. Her list is, however, titled “Why You May Want to Dump Me As Your Facebook Friend.” I dropped some of hers, added some of my own, tweaked here and there and made it my own. And just so you don’t hate me for doing this, LOL, she totally gave her readers permission to steal, tweak, and post as their own as well. Just so you know… (Never mind the fact that she is a MUCH better writer than me and a much more interesting person as well. )
1. “I have babies for Gay Men. If you have an issue with Surrogacy or Marvelous People who happen to be Gay . . . ” then I will annoy you and you just need to delete me off your favorites (’cause I know I’m in there :-P) or unfriend me on FB. I was very lucky to have had three beautiful children of my own with absolutely no troubles because of my heterosexual marriage and my amazing gift of being able to grow healthy babies in my uterus. It simultaneously breaks my heart and angers me that people actually think they can tell other people who they can sleep with and that their sexual orientation is not worthy of parenthood. So if for some reason you don’t agree with what I’m doing and the thought of it sickens you…fuck you and I don’t care to have you in my life. That’s all I gotta say about that…(a la Forrest Gump )
2. That led nicely into my next topic…I cuss. I cuss a lot. It’s absolutely ridiculous how many cuss words flow from my mouth on an hourly basis. I don’t do it to “be cool” (that’s actually laughable, heard that one before), to impress or shock anyone, to get a reaction of any sort from those around me, and it’s not a lack of intelligence or vocabulary. I actually have 5 years of post HS education (sadly with no degree but that’s another story ). Believe it or not, it’s not always about YOU (general you). It’s just a very, very bad habit of mine, almost like a tick. And yes, I do cuss in front of my mother and I do kiss her with this mouth, I have accidentally cussed in a church and a funeral or two, and I’m 34 years old and a grown ass women and the odds of this changing are very slim. Sorry, you’re just going to have to deal with it. It bugs the hell out of my husband and believe it or not, no my kids have not picked up on my nasty habit so that is not going to get me to change my evil ways. I just have a foul mouth, no reason behind it. I’m actually pretty good about not cussing as much in my writing, though. But honestly I think it has more to do with my laziness as if I wrote exactly how I thought there’d be about 20 cuss words peppered throughout this paragraph alone.
3. I am an equal opportunity meanie. I make fun of EVERYONE regardless of sex, religion, etc etc. And just to clear that one up just a bit more…I do not make fun of you because you are a Christian or just because you are Canadian (okay, maybe the Canadian one). I’m more of a “make fun of you because you did something really fucking stupid and I’m calling you out on it regardless of the fact that it may not be PC” kind of person. I also love to make fun of hypocrites and will tear them apart mercilessly so if you think everyone needs forgiveness and believe in “judge not lest ye be judged”…again, I don’t care. I’m not perfect I know that. But I also don’t go around telling others how to live their lives while secretly doing all those evil things I’m preaching against. So I will make fun of the homophobic preacher who got caught with his boyfriend at the airport and I will be very vocal about my disdain at drivers with handicapped plates who can’t go above 40 on a freakin’ highway. If your handicap makes you incapable of driving safely then don’t fucking drive. Okay…I’m done with that one.
4. I have three beautiful children and I will post pictures of them, cute stories about them, and I will post updates of our family website, etc. If this annoys you then too bad, that’s me. I love them, they are my life. I love, love looking at pictures of my friends’ and family’s kiddos. This includes my online friends, too. I love to see what other people do with their kiddos and I kind of get a glimpse into what those people were like when they were little. It also gives me ideas of what to do with my own kiddos when a certain situation arises or if I just need a new activity to entertain them. I also love to read your blogs so share them, don’t be shy. Because I will share and if you don’t like it…that’s okay. But I will annoy ya.
So that’s my heads up to you all. There are many, many more things that I’m sure annoy you about me (if you already know me in real life) or for those of us who are just getting acquainted you will probably find more things on your own. Just know I don’t start out my day looking to be a big ol’ meanie or wanting to offend. This is just who I am and being that I’m pretty damn old…things are just not going to change. So you can either learn to ignore whatever it is you don’t like or just write me off. If I’m sharing this with you either through facebook, or blog, or online forum, I’m doing it because there’s something about you that I think is pretty cool. So hopefully you won’t write me off so easily.
…is not a virtue I hold. At all. I’m sitting here today checking my email constantly and looking at my phone to make sure it’s actually on waiting for the call from someone telling me it’s time to get started with my calendar. Time to double check that address so we can send off the meds. It’s June, for Pete’s sake. I only just matched with Kevin in April so this is actually moving along pretty quickly.
That’s right, I’m not a patient person. Never have been. It’s funny, my first taste of really getting the idea that some things are out of your control was in the military. I always heard it’s hurry up and wait. And then when I first started in surrogacy I heard the same thing. It’s so true, too. Some things will happen very quickly while others won’t or even just stop you dead in your tracks. You would think I should know better, too, that these things can take time. I need to just look at my first go at a surrogacy journey to remember this little truth.
Flashback time…I don’t remember exact dates, months, etc but I do know that from the time I first signed on with my agency until the actual time of transfer date with Xavier & Bernard’s future little princess, Viktoria, it was a grand total of 2 1/2 years. Yep, you read that right. Do you remember when I spoke of the sonohysterogram we receive as applicants as part of our medical screening to become surrogates? Well, my first go around in September of 2007 was not that great. We found polyps. So off I went to schedule a hysteroscopy to get those removed and biopsied (standard procedure from what I hear) and luckily they were just a nuisance and in the way and posed no danger to me. I remember my sister took me to the hospital for the procedure and drove me home afterward. We got Chick-Fil-A on the way home. Isn’t it funny the weird things you remember? LOL
After the hysteroscopy they needed a normal pap to move forward. So off I go to the doctor again for my pap. And wouldn’t you know…it’s abnormal. Really?! WTF! Okay, okay…abnormal paps are not incredibly uncommon and don’t always mean anything. Usually you just wait have to wait a certain amount of time and need to have it redone. So I did just that. Honestly, I can’t remember how long it was but I waited and scheduled and had my followup pap. And again it was abnormal. What followed then, you ask? Why a colposcopy, a cervical biospy. It actually wasn’t that bad. Sure with each piece of disappointing news my heart skipped a beat. But I just wanted to go on to the next step to make sure I was healthy. It’s unnerving, but at the time I really was just taking it one step at a time.
Again my results were not great. Now I’m not going to lie. Medical terms fall into the category of science for me and I am NOT good at remembering them. I can tell you the basic mechanics of certain things, procedures, etc…but I cannot remember medical terms. So I apologize if I’m messing up some terminology here. Basically, again, the results were showing abnormal cells. It just wasn’t my day when I got those results a few weeks later. You want to know the funny thing I remember about the day of the colposcopy? I drove to BAMC for that procedure. I hate BAMC. Part of town I avoid and I hate the stupid parking lot. Well…I got lost trying to find my car afterward. Wait for it…wait for it…and it was raining. Yep, there was a thunderstorm and I was getting soaked walking around aimlessly looking for my car and I was NOT going to admit it by going in and asking for a ride from the golfcart guy. Not at BAMC where there are soldiers with missing limbs and recovering from horrible burns on their body (that’s what I’m thinking to myself). BAMC, one of the major hospitals where our servicemen and women go to recover and receive care after returning from the desert. So instead I wandered the parking lot crying and grateful it was raining and so my tears could be washed away by the rain. Oh, don’t worry. It’s okay to laugh at me. I certainly was 30 minutes later when I finally found my car. LOL
Moving on…it’s time to decide. I get my results (abnormal) and I need to decide what I want. Do I want a LEEP or cone biopsy? A quick google search will give you specifics on each procedure but I decided I didn’t want to be put under again so I opted for the LEEP. So after a few months of navigating the stupid military medical system and finally being scheduled for my procedure I had my LEEP. Alright, let me preface this by saying I’ve done a lot of reading of personal experiences and I seem to NOT be the norm so I don’t mean to scare anyone who will ever have the LEEP done. It’s supposed to be rather painless and a quick procedure. For me, it was one of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had. I guess I’m a freak. ‘Cause that shit hurt like a mofo. Go ahead, google it. You’ll read exactly what a LEEP is and you’ll see it’s supposed to NOT hurt. Why oh why did I experience excruciating pain then? OMG The pain was so bad my blood pressure skyrocketed and I almost passed out. They actually had to use smelling salts on me. The doctor and the nurses were fabulous, though. They really were amazing with helping me through it. The doctor was concerned and asked if we wanted to halt and schedule me for the cone biopsy (you get put under) but i told her to just go for it and I’d work through it. And of course I was fine afterward. In the end that’s all that matters.
Fast forward…it’s time for another pap. And guess what? It was normal…yay!!! I was so happy. After all that, I had a fucking golden cervix and uterus. Hellz yeah!! LOL Sorry, I just remember how happy I was that all was good and I was finally able to move forward. So finally in March of 2010 I was laying on the table in Dr. Ringler’s office, getting a beautiful, perfect little embryo implanted into my now golden uterus. My friend Stacey was with me since the guys couldn’t come out for the transfer. Finally, finally…I was there.
And as I sit here and wait for my calendar so I can start my meds, I need to realize that even though I am waiting, at least it’s happening. So yes, I’m very happy we’re here today…but I still gotta be me and bitch and moan in the meantime. ‘Cause I’m just not a patient person.
The question sucks because no matter how you look at it, there’s bad news. I know that some people like to hear the bad first to get it over and out of the way so they can then finish off with the good news. Like dessert, I suppose. What I don’t like about that, though, is that you don’t get to enjoy the good all by itself for even a second. Once you hear the good you’re still left with the bad you insisted on hearing first.
So I’m a “hear the good news first and enjoy it for a nano second without a care in the world of the bad” kinda gal. Just a second. Give me one little second with no bad.
The good…I received an email from Kevin and the agency yesterday and the egg donor has been medically cleared. Hooray!! It’s now just contracts for her and then we can get that coveted calendar. So perhaps as soon as the next couple of weeks I will be starting meds. Maybe?
I also received an email from Bernard and Xavier. They are in the process of remodeling their flat and are doing great. I remember when they showed me the plans when I visited and how excited they were about it. They already live in an amazing space, and with the remodeling it’s going to be even more amazing. Jealous… They promised to send new pictures soon so I can see how big and gorgeous Viktoria has become. Yay!!
Okay, now let’s savor the good for a moment. Don’t skip ahead to the bad just yet. Enjoying, enjoying…that’s nice.
And now the bad…not life altering at all, but it totally messed with our summer plans and that sucks for now. Clara has to take summer school. I don’t say this to shame or embarrass her, I am simply sharing because it’s going to become quite obvious that our plans for travel are not happening in June as I’d planned. I also share this because life is not always rainbows and sunshine and pink frosted cupcakes with sprinkles. Sometimes it’s a wicked thunderstorm that knocks out your satellite reception in the middle of the season finale of your favorite show or okra for dinner. Not anything that’ll change your life drastically, but enough to ruin your day or week. Or in this case your month.
My beautiful and smart 13 year old girl decided that this year was the year she was going to “do it her way” and screwed around in her classes. The details…that’s between Kenny and I, Clara, her school and the rest of the neighborhood (the bits & pieces they were able to put together during our “conversations” anyway ). So starting on Monday the girl must go to summer school for the entire month of June. Aaaaaannnndddd we have to pay $200 for the privilege of sending her. If you have any fun or inventive forms of punishment, please inbox me. I’d love to hear your ideas.
So yup…my plans of hopping between the Valley and home for the month of June are out the window. I must take her to summer school everyday, lots of driving I hadn’t planned on doing on a daily basis during the summer. Believe it or not, I actually put less miles on the car driving between the Valley and San Antonio during the summer than I do driving the kids to and from school daily. It’s completely insane. So because my daughter decided to screw around, the whole family gets punished.
And don’t start…I realize there are worse things in life. Which is why I’ve compared this to okra for dinner (can you tell I don’t like okra, LOL). We’ll move our travel plans to July and I’ll rethink June for the little ones. I’ll add some books to the Kindle and bring along my library card so I can have something to keep me occupied at the nearby library while Clara’s in class (to cut down on driving back and forth). I’m great at changing plans last minute and being able to go with the flow. It is nice to vent, though.
So instead of those delicous cupcakes I’ve been admiring on Kay Kito’s Facebook Page, it’ll be okra for the rest of the month. No really, why the hell does that shit exist?