The transfer that came and went…

Posted by Dalia on November 20, 2011 in Food, Surrogacy, Travel |

Getting ready for this current embryo transfer was much like my last one…preparing the house for my absence, making lists of the things I must take, packing for the possibility of being in California longer than anticipated, and of course trying to get my nerves under control. I could go into detail on the list of all the other “fun” stuff you should do to prepare for transfer but I actually believe a sister surrogate does it best in her blog post “What to Expect When You’re a Surrogate Mother-The Transfer Edition.” If you’re brand new to surrogacy or even if you’ve been there done that already, check it out as it’s a great and funny resource for us surrogates. :-)

Now in addition to the usuals I have to add on my fear of flying. I absolutely hate it. For those of you with that same fear you know how sometimes even the most exciting trip can be overshadowed pre-trip by the actual flight. You’d think I would be over it by now, I have flown quite a bit including across OCEANS…but nope. I’d like to say it’s getting better but I think I’m just getting better at masking it. Inside I’m still terrified my plane is going down. So off I go to LAX with my way too stuffed suitcase (which I actually checked, I never do that) and I’m ready to get this party started. Nice hotel, nice town, and now I must get ready for my date with my wonderful IF (intended father). The nerves are now being redirected in a different direction. We have kept in touch since our match meeting, of course, but it is only our second time meeting. My first night there we decide to finally have our second date and I must say I put way too much time and thought into getting ready and putting together an outfit for a date with a gay man. LOL I think I did good, though.

But look, look…my awesome present from my IF. I am a HUGE Golden Girls and Betty White freak and my IF gifted me the complete DVD set of the Golden Girls. Eeeeek, this girl’s in heaven. Can’t wait to start the marathon! :D


Now, when our embryo transfer dates are given to us by the clinic it’s either of 2 days…a 3 day or 5 day transfer. Grade and viability of these embryos are factors taken into consideration when deciding the day of the transfer. We were lucky that we had a nice number of embryos and great quality to go ahead and aim for that 5 day transfer. So Monday morning I get the call that our transfer will indeed happen on 16 November. As many of you are already aware that day is very dear to me. That is my very first surrobabe’s FIRST birthday. Numbers and dates and good luck charms are just another thing to add to the world of science for me to help this transfer be successful. Sometimes it’s all I have when things are out of my control. But come on, you have got to admit having 11 embryos created on 11.11.11 and transferring on the precious Viktoria’s birthday are pretty freakin’ cool. Oh…and the coolness does not end there.

Unfortunately before I left Texas I was not able to get my much needed massage from my good friend and my favorite massage therapist, Jessica. Our schedules just were not meshing so I was forced to leave town without my deep tissue massage. However, now that our transfer was postponed a few days I was able to schedule something locally in California. First of all, ouch! Prices are way ridiculous over there. Second, I’m so picky with my massages that I’m very nervous scheduling anything at all. But the thing is I really need that massage so I start looking for local spas. I’m kind of limited, though, as I have no car and the hotel shuttle is free as long as it’s within 3 miles. Finally I settle on what I must say was the best choice for more than one reason.

If anyone is ever in Pasadena for any reason I’m going to tell you now, go to Cote d’Azur. Absolutely one of the best massages I have ever received in my life. Cat, my therapist, was AMAZING! Tiny little thing, I was worried I wouldn’t get the pressure I needed but the deep tissue she gave me was exactly what I needed. The ambiance set was great, very new age without pretention (hate that) and so relaxing and calming. I also spoiled myself with an extra treatment which included a tummy massage and mask. I know, sounds weird but it was great. It also included another shoulder and scalp massage. I was in heaven. But here’s the cool part about my spa experience. First off, Cote D’Azur is a region in France known as the French Riviera, where the lovely Viktoria lives with her daddies. Second, the lady who finished my treatment for the day which included the tummy massage…a mom to twins. Yep, she had boy/girl twins. Oh yeah, might help to clue those of you not in the know, we’re aiming for twins. I’m sorry but all of that was just way too amazing to not share. Loved it! :-D

And what does one enjoy post deep tissue massage (besides tons of water, of course)? Why Thai food, of course. :-D Cafe Linda for any of you all headed out to Pasadena. Mmmm…so yummy. And probably some of the best Thai tea I’ve had in a very long time.


The rest of my time there seemed to both drag on (can Wednesday just get here already?!) and fly by so quickly as well. The day of transfer I show up to the clinic ready to get this party started. I come with my phone in hand, to update my wonderful contact buddy and surrosister extraordinaire, Michelle, and of course with my bottle of water ready to fill my bladder for the ultrasound. So we’re finally here, the day we’ve been anticipating for quite awhile now and it’s time to get knocked up. I must say I love our doctor, Dr. Kolb. He has a way of putting you at ease, giving you the information you need without making you feel stupid for not understanding the science right away. I love this man. So we do our pre-transfer routine and then get right to it.

And now we’re here. We transferred two great quality embryos on 16 November, a fresh 5 day transfer. Today we just wait patiently to see if I am pregnant. Intended parents and surrogates go into this process with the best intentions and most positive attitudes, but at the end of the day we all get nervous, impatient, and yes, sometimes do a little of that “what if…?”. So that’s where I am. In my heart I know this had to be it but I’m still nagged with the “other”. I’m crampy, very crampy. I don’t remember feeling this crampy last time. Kenny, my husband, tells me I was. It’s funny the things we forget. Sort of like the pain of birth. Our official pregnancy test, the blood draw (BETA), isn’t until Monday, 28 November. Seems like an eternity away. My IF and I plan for me to do home pregnancy tests so that we can have an idea before then but it’s still so nerve wracking.

The waiting game…it sucks. Luckily I have Thanksgiving to keep me busy. My sister and her family will be coming up to feast with us. A house full of preoccupation and noise is a great way to pass the time. Food, good food, also makes me happy so there you go. LOL

I want to end this blog with a recent picture of my little surroPrincess, Viktoria. One year old, can you believe it? Seems so long ago already. Can’t wait to help give my current IF his family as well. :-)



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